…With the death of her husband came another misfortune. Reuben’s life savings were lost. A few days before he died, he had taken jewelry out of the house, some of it he gave away for sale, some he decided to hide with relatives and friends, because we were supposed to go to the resort. Unfortunately, he didn’t have time to say to whom and where he took these things. After all during the years of socialism people were afraid to keep their savings in savings banks or at home, and so invested in jewelry. It was very dangerous to keep expensive jewelry at home, especially in the home of a merchant, was very dangerous. A year of mourning, a year of memorials purchase and installation of the monument, a year out of work – all took a toll on our budget.
If to tell someone that we were left without a livelihood, no one would believe it. But no one felt it, and no one knew. It was thought that a jewelry store worker had provided for himself and his children for life.
Everything went on as before. I cried all year and couldn’t understand why it had happened to us. After all, life was just getting better, the house was finished, my eldest son graduated from the Moscow Engineering and Construction Institute and started independent as an engineer. The daughter had finished high school and was to enter this year Institute, the youngest Nisan was 14 years old and was studying at a secondary school.
Ruben, tired of working in the trade, promised to go to another job after his vacation.
I wanted to return to teaching, because I was only 42 years old. We talked more and more
we talked more and more about my son getting married and my daughter getting married. At home, as always, there were a lot of people and fun. But fate decided to change everything – the death of my husband devastated us. Disappointment of life, that’s what came to my mind more and more often. The very notion of “life” lost its meaning.
I didn’t want to live. But there were unsettled children around, who needed care and
a guide to realizing for Ruben and I to realize our dreams.
I had to start from scratch.
I’ve always been tough strong-willed. And this time, I found the strength not to break down, but to take the fate of my family into my own hands so that my children wouldn’t feel fatherless and live well.
Moments of joy with our mother.
They all got higher education, got prestigious jobs, started families. As much as possible, I helped them even after their weddings.
It was not easy to maintain a big house and a whole family. But Ruben’s spirit helped me.
Fate was not kind to me. There were some “people” who thought they could to scare, insult and deceive a defenseless woman. I don’t hold it against them, let God judge them. Time passed, and they came and apologized for their meanness. My patience willpower and life experience told me how to find a common language with everyone around me, how to please everyone, if necessary, to help. I was not ashamed of any work: if need help in holding a wake or any other event, even with strangers, – people, I helped. To prepare a memorial pilaf for 100 or more people or any other extraordinary dish was no problem. I considered it a mitzvah. A year after Ruben’s death, the director of Uzuvelirtorg, where my husband worked, called me in and
Preparation for Easter
Passover seder
said: Tamara, I knew Ruben as an intelligent and responsible worker, and I know that during his time as director of the jewelry store, you helped him and, moreover, even during his work as director of the jewelry store, you helped him, and moreover, even replaced him filling in for him. Knowing your family, honesty and responsibility in your work, I want to help you your family, as well as repay Ruben for his hard work and dedication. I would like offer you a position as a salesman in a jewelry store, and then we’ll see…”.
I accepted Director Agzamov’s noble offer. I went to work
I served from a simple salesman to the director of the store. At one time I worked as a sales clerk in a jewelry store where the director was Oizimhon. A beautiful, intelligent woman. I felt at ease around her. She helped me in many ways – to learn the intricacies of a trade worker, she insured my actions and deeds. Then I worked in souvenir stores. And so on until I left for the USA
I was highly regarded by both employees and customers.
As I was considered a professional in various types of gemstones and gold jewelry, people came to me for advice at all hours of the day and night gold jewelry, people came to me for advice at any time of the day or night listened to and thanked me for my help. Especially during the days of emigration 1970-90s.
My children and I honored the traditions we followed under Reuben. The doors of our home were open to everyone at all times. I continued to offer assistance attention to anyone who came to me, just as my husband Reuben did. All holidays various events were celebrated in our home. The wedding of Boris in 1964, then the wedding of Rosa in 1966 and Nikolai in 1977 were also held in this house. In 1979, the eldest son Boris applied to go abroad. I did not prevent Boris’s family from leaving even though they told me: What are you doing? How can you let your eldest son, how will you be without him, why don’t you think about your old age?” I foresaw that the time would come the time would come and we too would have to leave this country. That was my husband’s dream too Ruben. In August 1979, we accompanied Boris and his family to the United States. His diligence allowed him to find himself in a new country – America. He defended his dissertation for a doctorate in engineering. He worked as an architect and had many of interesting designs and built projects. After 9 years, he came to visit Tashkent for the first time.
In 1987, when the times of “perestroika” came, I was able to travel to Israel to visit the grave of my father Abram Chaim and to meet my brother Shmuel and his family.
It is very hard to pass on these exciting moments of life. It has been 54 years since we saw Daddy for the last time 36 years since he was killed in Jerusalem. We must pay tribute to brother Shmuel and his family for the Herculean effort to find our family’s graves and putting them in order.
I arrived in the summer, in the heat, the transfer to Greece was exhausting hard. Lack of language skills and chaperones made the trip worse grateful to everyone who gave me attention and support during this flight.
My son Boris flew to Israel from the United States to meet me. We visited many of our acquaintances and friends. Almost sixty years later, I met my cousins sisters and brothers. 1987 Boris sent a visitor’s visa to America to Rosa and Nikolai.
As always, I was preoccupied with how to pay for the children’s expensive trip, the long journey to the United States. I was told by “experienced” people to buy mumiyo. At the pharmacy where I bought the mumiyo, I fell and came home with a sprained arm. It was the day before the kids left, and they were traveling for almost 40 days. I didn’t allow them to postpone the trip saying that nothing terrible had happened, and I wasn’t alone – Nikolai’s wife Faina.
For the first time, Tamara is visiting her father’s Abram Haim Mavashev’s memorial. Israel, 1987
Visiting her brother Shmuel in Israel. Western wall and the Mediterranean sea
Tamara visiting her niece Berta Kalantarova (first from the right) in Israel.
Meeting with relatives whom Tamara hasn’t seen for over 50 years. Israel
Tamara Mavasheva and Iosif Gulkarov (on the right) are visiting their friend Amner Levaev (center) in Israel.
Boris Gulkarov with his mother Tamara Mavasheva at Amner’s and his son’s Levi Levayev’s office in Israel
Tamara visiting her husband’s nephew professor Iosif and his wife Tamara Gulkarova in Israel.
